All I have I hope
by starmans god
Summary: Set before the Thunderbirds and just after Lucy's death. John feels guilty, Scott's annoyed, Alan and Gordon have their suspicions, Virgil is well, Virgil


**Ok so, where shall I start,**

 **I don't own The Thunderbirds. I was thinking, (Which is never a good thing) how in the name of god does Gordon get into the silos. I mean there has to be an elevator somewhere, but in the last episode of season one, he launches from the island, how does it get from TB2 to its launch. If anyone can tell me that would be great.**

 **I take story requests too so if you want me to write something tell me and I will try to make that happen.**

 **Sometimes all you need is hope, is set before international rescue.**

 **The ages are as follows:**

 **Scott: 16**

 **John: 13**

 **Virgil: 11**

 **Gordon: 9**

 **Alan: 5**

 **I refuse to believe that John is the middle child. So that's why it is like this.**

* * *

Just one year ago the mother of Scott, John, Virgil, Gordon, and Alan Tracy had died. In result, it sent their father into a deep depression that he covered up in work. Comming home at ridiculous hours of the night and leaving after only six hours of sleep.

This left sixteen-year-old Scott to take care of four younger brothers and left him with only a barely passing in each class. He cooked, cleaned, sent them off to school, did the washing, with only the occasional help off John and Virgil because Scott said to stay up to date with homework and to not let it get out of control. Scott stands in front of the mountain of dirty dishes and sighs. He turns the tap on exhaustedly and yawns, it's only four o'clock he shouldn't be yawning. He starts washing the dishes half-heartedly.

John just felt like it was his fault for their mum's death. It was his science fair they were going to, so it was his fault. And until someone told him otherwise he believed it. But at the moment he sat in bed, in his bedroom that he shares with Scott, Felling sick. But he had to go to school Dad would see the email saying he wasn't there and get angry. Not like he cared. He was usually the most level-headed of all his brothers and took the longest to aggravated.

Virgil hangs out the washing and brings it in, which is what he's doing at the moment. Deep in thought about the fight he had at school today and how he was suspended. Now how was he going to explain this to his father?

Both Gordon and Alan are lost without their mother. They have no idea why she hasn't come home yet and why daddy doesn't like them. Well he doesn't look at them does he, he doesn't even talk to them and tell what happened. In their eyes, he doesn't like them anymore. They play in their room with toy cars and stuffed animals. Alan taking a liking to the car and Gordon the purple squid.

The sound of screeching tires causes all the boys to jump as speedily finish what they're doing, in the two younger boys' case clean up. A car pulls up in the driveway and Jeff get's put angrily. He slams the car door as he gets out and storms into the house.

"Boys get here now!" He yells as he comes inside. The kids all make their way into the lounge room and stand in a straight line from oldest to youngest. "Scott why are you failing all your classes! And John why weren't you at school!" he snaps

"If you haven't noticed," John yells "this family is falling apart and you damn well aren't helping!" Jeff slaps John causing him to stumble back onto the hardwood floor clutching the side of his face.

"How dare you talk back to me that way! Your mother would be so diss-" Jeff starts to yells but is cut off

"If you finish that sentence, mum won't be the only person you'll miss," Scott threatens and Jeff looks astounded at the ferocity he says it because he stumbles back. John bolts from the room in the direction of the bathroom followed closely by Virgil. "Take a look around _Jeff,_ mum isn't here. she never will be again. John's been sick for three days. he went to school for most of that, the only reason he stayed at home today is that the bus driver brought him back home because he passed out going to school! I am the only reason this house hasn't exploded from the amount of crap that has been going on! I haven't gone to bed in five days from the amount of shit that needs to be picked up around here!" Scott screams at his father making him shrink back.

Gordon and Alan, run out of the lounge room, scared about what might happen next.

"Scott, I-" Jeff begins

"Save it for someone that wants to hear it," Scott snaps and leaves the room to go find John, leaving Jeff in the dusty room, _how do I fix this,_ he thinks as he watches Scott walk out of the room.

John is in the bathroom throwing up what little he has eaten in the past few hours. When he ran in here he locked the door behind him so no one would follow and see how sick he really was. He cleans himself up as he hears banging on the door.

John opens the door to see Scott standing in front of Virgil who he slammed the door into in his rush to get here.

"John can you have a shower and go to bed please, you shouldn't have come down," Scott asks pleadingly and he just nods in response

"Just let me get a new set of pj's," John says and Virgil hands him a blue shirt and pants "Thanks,"

"Look if you hear any yelling when you go to bed doesn't come down, that includes you too Virgil. Dad and I are going to have a little chat," Scott whispers "Is your face ok?"

John nods and slowly closes the door.

"Ok Virgil can you keep the terrible two in their room. Don't come out unless you have too," Scott orders as he turns to face his brother.

"Sure, but can you come and me when you're done?"

Scott nods in reply and points to the stairs, indicating to go now.

As the three youngest leave, Scott makes a bee-line back to the lounge room.

* * *

Jeff sits on his mother's vintage chair with his head in his hands. How could he mess up this badly, how had he broken his promise to his wife? He failed.

Now as he sits there he realises all that he has missed. John's sick as a dog and Scott looks like he hasn't slept in months. Virgil is almost four inches taller than he was before and he never noticed how both Gordon and Alan are quieter than they have ever been.

But as he sits there, he thinks about how he pushed his family aside to fulfil a stupid dream of his.

He lifts his head and looks at Scott who has been watching his father for the past three minutes.

"How are they?" He asks

"Fine," Scott replies sharply

"Scott..."

"Save it, I don't want to hear it. You leave to go to work and don't even call to tell us when you're coming home!" He yells "When was the last time you looked at _us_ Without leaving the room, Mom ISN'T HERE AND SHE WON'T BE COMING BACK SO STOP PRETENDING THAT SHE IS!" Scott accends into a scream and Jeff slowly stands up with raw fury in his eyes.

"DON'T YOU EVER TALK ABOUT HER LIKE THAT" He yells back and grabs Scott's arm just above the elbow causing him to let out a small yelp.

Scott attempts to get out of his grasps but fails as Jeff is much stronger than the 16-year-old.

"Let go of him!" Alan yells stepping into the room

"Get out of here!" Scott screams terrified

"Dad stop. Please," Alan starts to cry.

Jeff lets go of Scott's arm, (which is now beginning to bruise), with a look of pure guilt in his eyes which soon turns into sadness.

"Daddy Mommy hasn't left us, there is a piece of her in all of us," Alan whispers

"I know," Jeff says full of guilt and he diverts his eyes to the floor.

"Is that why you don't like me?" Alan asks innocently

Jeff's eyes shoot up and unknowing tears streak down his cheeks, "I love you, Alan. It's just taking me a while to readjust to not having your mom around," Jeff sighs and kneels down to Alan's eye level. looking him straight in the eye Jeff starts his sentence but is interrupted by Alan running off toward the stairs.

"You didn't answer my question!" He yells as he runs off. Leaving Jeff to look heartbroken and ready to burst out in tears.

"Dad this is going to take a while, don't make him rush it," Scott says in an unusually calm voice for the previous conversation.

"How do you know that?"

"Because I have hope,"

* * *

 **Tell me if it's cheesy as hell, And review, I always like reading your replies.**

 **If you have any request I am happy to have a look at them. Hope you enjoyed**


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